Lived Experience Blog
The Girl in the Dirty Dress
The Girl in the Dirty Dress: Shame, Survival, and the Power of Co-Regulation When our nervous system is overwhelmed, our rational, intelligent thinking brain goes offline. In those moments, the body does what it must to survive. We freeze. We go silent. We disconnect. Years later, many of us look…
Behind The Façade
Behind the façade. The words Boarding School conjure up different meanings depending on our exposure and experience. For me it presents memories of abuse, mixed with thoughts of friends and fun. Adventures and pain, laughter and fear. From high school to boarding school, home to dorm, mum to…
When Trauma Speaks in Dreams: From Nightmares to Healing
For many years, I have experienced vivid dreams that stayed with me long after waking. You know the kind - that leave a trace of terror in your soul. At times they left me panicked, sweating, or in tears. For a long time, I wondered why my mind wouldn’t let me rest. But as I’ve learned more about…
An Uncomfortable Truth
Women are capable and active in the sexual exploitation of children and adults, online, directly and within rings of abuse and grooming. The recent coverage of Ghislaine Maxwell’s prison interview and more noticeably the responses to her words, highlights that people are often uncomfortable with…
Breaking the Self-Fulfilling Prophecies of Trauma
Complex trauma leaves invisible imprints that can quietly shape how we see ourselves, others, and the world. One of the most powerful — and painful — ways this shows up is through self-fulfilling prophecies. Rejection Take rejection, for example. A simple, everyday situation like sending a text to…
The Power of Telling the Truth About Anxiety
Last night, during our CBT group for anxiety, we watched a short video showing common situations that can trigger anxious thoughts — like public speaking. The narrator offered examples of typical worries: “I might forget my words… I might embarrass myself… people will see I’m nervous and judge……
What Does It Really Mean to Love and Accept Yourself Unconditionally?
“Love and accept yourself unconditionally.” It sounds beautiful, doesn’t it? But for many of us, those words land with a thud. Instead of comfort, we feel resistance. Instead of inspiration, we feel guilt, shame, or even anger. I remember hearing that phrase at different points in my own healing…
Hope
Encountering hope. Once, then, and now. Over my lifetime hope has meant different things. The dreams and wishes I had as a child are returning, replacing, and reframing the wishes of many years. I recently had a conversation about how to lead people to a place where hope feels both possible and…
Gratitude Attitude: Planting Seeds of Self-Worth
In our Self Discovery for Recovery program, we begin with the foundations: looking within, practising self-care, and repeating daily I Am affirmations. Why? Because repetition drives neuroplasticity. The more often we plant healthy thoughts, the stronger they grow. Our thoughts shape our lives.…
The Stories We Tell Ourselves: Neural Pathways, Trauma, and Self-Worth
From the moment we are born, our brains are wired with remarkable potential. Dr. Dan Siegel’s Interpersonal Neurobiology reminds us that human beings develop through two kinds of neural pathways: Experience-Expectant Pathways These are the “hardwired” pathways we are born with, designed to expect…