Reputation savaging is an act of violence by innuendo to cause a targeted individual to be lowered in a group’s estimation (Petric, 2022). A ruined reputation seriously effects the well-being of those who experience it (Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, 2018). An individual’s reputation affects how they feel about themselves and how others see them. Reputation savaging affects victims on a biological, social and psychological level. Understanding the behaviour of those that steal reputations will help you to be more discerning in the company that you keep. Understanding the realities of anti-social behaviour is the key to protecting your reputation (Airmic.com, 2017).
A good reputation is a valuable social structure, that informs other people that they can trust you to take their interest into account and that you exhibit stable behaviour (Erving, 2024). A good reputation is a competence marker and a social moral virtue, signifying that you are on the side of the Just. For those with anti-social personalities they will want to tap into this unearned social credit resource. They will be attracted to the superior hierarchy it can provide them while being unburdened by the weight of the moral responsibilities that others have taken on to achieve a good reputation. Those with anti-social personality disorders seek out others with strong moral characters as a camouflage for their own failings and split their moral self-image and inferior self-image onto others (Cuncic, 2022).
Narcissists cannot see the true reflection of themselves, instead they will want to adopt yours. What they covet in you will eventually lead to resentfulness and envy of you. Narcissists will often over claim their abilities and by stealing the reputation of others they can enhance their own reputation and abilities. Through derogation of you they attempt to self-elevate. Innuendo can be as subtle as the use of body language such as negative facial expressions which are loaded with hidden social messages. A look of disgust can be a powerful way to throw shade at a target. Disgust feelings are associated with a sense of justice and injustice and at a primordial level are a signal to others in a group to keep clear of an object of disgust. Similarly, the perpetrator operates through subtle manipulations such as acting anxious or scared is a subtle messaging to other to be wary of you. The veiled criticisms are orchestrated emotional games.
The reverse halo affect will undo all your previous good work and the old adage that there is no smoke without fire will come at an unbelievably high cost to you (Erving, 2024). The perpetrator’s goal is to bait the target into acting like a perpetrator and cause a break down in trust and communication within the group (Bay, 2024).
Narcissists thrive in the chaos and confusion they create as they deflect from themselves. Your success only highlights their failure. Narcissists are essentially trapped in themselves unable to self-reflect and therefore grow. The anti-social personality that wants what you have soon turns into, thinking that you don’t deserve what you have. Envy is corrosive and it festers into resentment (Airmic.com, 2017). Resentment leads to sabotage, passive aggressive body language, and direct rumour to discredit you. Gaslighting is their psychological warfare, and it will distort all perceptions of reality (Airmic.com, 2017). Deception and manipulations are the weapons used by anti-social people to control others (Airmic.com, 2017). If you do not want to believe that there are people in the world that are malicious and thrive on destruction you will not put up barriers to them Erving, M. (2024).
Once your eyes are opened to anti-social people, you cannot unsee what you have seen and there is power in that. Toxic people can be recognized in patterns of their behaviour or perhaps an accumulation of passive aggressive comments meant to undermine you. Exploit kindness, societal views of loyalty and use guilt to achieve your compliance and tether you to their Chaos. Toxic people seek emotional entanglement and will poison every part of your life and erode your peace of mind. Anti-social people thrive in the darkness of confusion and cannot survive in the light. Self-respect is not negotiable, and it requires boundaries that are the gate keeper to toxic people. Preserving a realistic picture of yourself and surrounding yourself with people who think both positively and realistically about you is the antidote for toxic lies and reputation savaging (Airmic.com, 2017).
Reference
Airmic.com. (2017). Understanding behaviour is key to protecting reputation | Airmic. [online] Available at: https://www.airmic.com/news/understanding-behaviour-key-protecting-reputation [Accessed 14 Feb. 2025].
Bay (2024). Understanding Triangulation: Effects and Strategies to Cope. [online] Bay Area CBT Center. Available at: https://bayareacbtcenter.com/triangulation/.
Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (2018). Addressing stigma. [online] CAMH. Available at: https://www.camh.ca/en/driving-change/addressing-stigma.Petric, D. (2022).
Cuncic, A. (2022). What Is Triangulation in Psychology? [online] Verywell Mind. Available at: https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-triangulation-in-psychology-5120617.
Erving, M. (2024). When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time. [online] Maria Erving — Transformational Teacher. Available at: https://mariaerving.com/when-someone-shows-you-who-they-are-believe-them-the-first-time/ [Accessed 14 Feb. 2025].
Psychology of Abusive Human Behavior. Open Journal of Medical Psychology, [online] 11(02), pp.29–38. doi: https://doi.org/10.4236/ojmp.2022.112003.
Rizvi, M. (2024). Why People Try to Ruin Others’ Lives: Hidden Motives Behind Their Behaviors. [online] Medium. Available at: https://medium.com/illumination/why-peopletry-to-ruin-others-lives-hidden-motives-behind-their-behaviors-1a1a9e5d5dc8 [Accessed 14 Feb. 2025].