Lived Experience Blog
Finding Belonging Away From Home
I’ve been reflecting on what it really means to belong — not just to live somewhere, but to feel that deep exhale of “this is home.” Is it possible to truly belong to a place you weren’t born or raised in? Is belonging something we’re invited into through acceptance — or something that grows…
RAS-A-Mataz! Your Brain’s Sixth Sense in Action
Ever walked into a room and felt something was off before anyone said a word? That’s not imagination — it’s your Reticular Activating System (RAS) at work. The RAS sits deep in the brainstem and acts like your inner filter. It decides what information reaches your awareness and what fades into the…
When People Try to Turn Others Against You
It’s something we see everywhere — from gutter media & politics to workplace bully's, even within families, so called friendships and community groups. Someone hears something they don’t like or disagrees with your truth, and instead of having a respectful conversation, they try to influence…
How Far is “Farthest”? Rethinking the Language of Welfare and Worth
When the Department for Work and Pensions classifies someone as “furthest from the labour market,” it might sound like neutral language — a simple policy term. But for the person it describes, already living in a state of survival, it can feel like a final verdict. “Farthest” sounds unreachable.…
17 Years of A Positive Start: From Rock Bottom to Rising Strong
Seventeen years ago today, I began a journey that I called A Positive Start. At the time, I’d been working on myself for a while, trying to make sense of why I kept ending up back at square one. The thing about dysregulation and survival mode is that while you’re living in it, you don’t see it —…
The Experience of Incongruence: When Words and Energy Don’t Match
There’s a moment we’ve all felt but can’t always explain — when something feels off. The words sound calm, kind, even loving, yet something inside contracts. Your stomach tightens, your breath shortens, and your body whispers, something isn’t right. That moment is the experience of incongruence —…
From Dysregulation to Evil: When Fear Becomes Power and Systems Lose Humanity
Understanding How Disconnection Shapes Behaviour, Narcissism, and Harm When we begin to recognise dysregulation in ourselves, we start to see it everywhere — in others, in relationships, in workplaces, and within the very systems that shape society. What begins as an individual survival response —…
Through the Windows of the Nervous System
How Our Inner State Shapes the Way We See the World In the same room, three people stand side by side — yet each looks out of a different window. One sees harmony. Another sees chaos. The third sees hell. These three windows represent how we experience life through our nervous system. Each window…
What It Really Means to Be Trauma-Informed and Person-Centred
The terms trauma-informed and person-centred are often used in today’s conversations about wellbeing, education, and social care — but rarely do they capture the depth of what these approaches truly mean. Being trauma-informed is not about excusing poor behaviour or avoiding accountability. It’s…
TRUTH: The Anchor for Healing and Mental Wellbeing
At A Positive Start CIC, we speak often about T.R.U.S.T., because without trust, there is no safety — and without safety, healing cannot happen. Our T.R.U.S.T. framework reminds us that: ✨ T – Trigger recognition ✨ R – Reassurance ✨ U – Understanding ✨ S – Safety ✨ T – Truth Truth is more than a…