One of the concepts we explore in our Reconnect & Regulate programme (starting Monday 29th June) is neuroplasticity – the brain’s remarkable ability to change, adapt, and form new neural pathways throughout our lives.
The image below captures an important truth, although I’d add a little nuance.
Our brains don’t simply create “more good” because we think positively. Rather, they strengthen the pathways we use most often.
If we repeatedly focus on danger, criticism, rejection, mistakes, or what might go wrong, those neural pathways become stronger. Equally, when we intentionally practise noticing strengths, opportunities, connection, gratitude, kindness, and moments of safety, those pathways become stronger too.
This is where the Reticular Activating System (RAS) enters the story.
In our workshops, I often jokingly call it “RASamataz” — the plot twist that most people don’t see coming.
The RAS acts like a filter, constantly deciding what information reaches our conscious awareness. When someone has experienced trauma, adversity, loss, violence, or prolonged stress, that filter often becomes highly skilled at detecting danger. Hypervigilance is not a flaw or weakness; it is an intelligent survival response.
The brain learns to ask:
“What’s wrong?”
“What’s unsafe?”
“What do I need to watch out for?”
And for many people, that system becomes exceptionally good at its job.
But here’s the RASamataz plot twist…
The same system that learned to scan for danger can be retrained to notice opportunities.
The same brain that became organised around survival can learn to recognise safety, connection, possibility, kindness, strengths, and growth.
Not by denying reality.
Not by forcing positivity.
Not by pretending life is perfect.
But by helping the brain notice that danger is not the whole story.
One of the exercises I often use with counselling clients is called Mia Vita – Latin for My Life.
Clients are given a shoebox with the words:
“Everything in this box is…”
Throughout the week, they add notes, memories, achievements, moments of gratitude, acts of kindness, strengths, opportunities, successes, connections, or anything else they would like their brain to notice more often.
This year, we’re bringing Mia Vita into our Reconnect & Regulate workshop as a collective exercise.
Over the eight weeks, participants will contribute to a shared box together. Each week they will add positive experiences, strengths, achievements, moments of courage, learning, connection, hope, and possibility.
In doing so, we are intentionally directing our attention.
Not because life is easy.
But because what we repeatedly look for, we become more likely to see.
What fascinates me is that participants are not only learning from their own experiences — they are borrowing hope from one another. Someone else’s moment of courage may remind us of our own. Someone else’s achievement may help us recognise possibilities we had previously filtered out.
And that is neuroplasticity in action.
New pathways are strengthened through repetition.
Attention begins to shift.
The brain starts noticing different things.
Perhaps that’s one of the reasons the Law of Attraction resonates with so many people. Not because the universe suddenly starts delivering things to us, but because our attention changes.
We begin noticing opportunities that were always there.
We recognise strengths that had previously been overlooked.
We become aware of connections, solutions, and possibilities that our hypervigilant brain may have filtered out.
In other words, a traumatised brain trains the RAS to ask:
“What’s dangerous?”
A healing brain begins teaching it to also ask:
“What’s possible?”
That’s the RASamataz plot twist.
Sometimes the biggest plot twist in healing is discovering that your brain is still capable of change.
Reconnect & Regulate – 8 Week Programme
📅 Starts Monday 29th June
🕕 6pm–8pm
📍 A Positive Start CIC, Harestanes Tower, Jedburgh
To learn more or book your place:
https://apositivestart.org.uk/reconnect-regulate-program/
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